[He lets out a soft hum, tilting his head as if in deep thought.]
I suppose that does mean you count as not-regular humanity. I guess I can make an exception for you.
[His smile fades- just a fraction. It doesn't go away completely, it's just a little softer. A little sadder. He's really struggling to see the good in him after the mess of July. ]
...Thank you. I- it might take me a little longer to see that again. [Not that he was all that good at seeing it before this.] I love you, too.
[It would probably sound more ominous if she wasn’t doing a ridiculous voice.]
I’d appreciate it. Saves breaking and entering all the time.
[She sees his smile soften and she tries brighten hers up. It’s a little slower than normal. There’s been a lot of sadness this month she’s been trying to cope with.]
That’s fine. It’s okay to not be okay. A wise alchemist once said that. Just take it a step at a time. I’m here for you.
He lets out a slow breath. She's right, hell, he'd said it himself and he knows he was right, too. It's what he needs, right now, the chance to just not be okay for a little while. He's tired and sad and so very scared that this town could do this again. Bring out the worst in him and have him hurt the people he cares about again. ]
Y-yeah. I think I just need that for a little while. It was a really, really awful month. Thank you, I'll- well, I'll do my best to be there for you, too.
[As much of a goddamn mess he is at the moment, anyway. ]
It's not something that's going to fix itself over night. You're allowed to hurt.
It was... Easily the worst I've seen since I got here. Still kind of reeling from it to be honest.
[She let's out a breath. ...It was just hard to see everyone at each others throats like that. She couldn't help but just feel powerless to stop things here and back at home.]
So let's just not be okay together for awhile... Or next week or something. When we can can actually get out of bed.
Yeah... yeah, I-I know. It's something that's gonna have to take time.
[Trying to force it won't do any of them any good - as much as he'd like to bury it all and try to ignore it... he knows it won't just go away. He needs to take time to process this. ]
There's nothing wrong with that. We'll just put one foot in front of the other for now.
We'll call it walking when we're ready and go from there.
[She needs the time herself. She let a lot of pressure fall on her shoulders and while she doesn't think it broke her, there was something that cracked and she needs to figure out just... how that changes things.]
If that ends up being too much. Just let me know. We can always adjust what we're doing.
That- that actually sounds really good. Just... take our time.
[He has people here who love him, and that will help him a lot, he's sure. In trying to put his broken pieces back into something functional again. And it's certainly not lost on him how much Ruby's been put through the wringer. She's always got so much faith in people, but this time it was really turned against her. Himself included. ]
Thanks. Y- you too, okay? We'll figure this out together.
[She'll figure it out. She just needs to time to figure out where's been bent and how to pull it back into place as best she can. It might not be perfect but that's not what she usually aims for.]
Of course. I wouldn't have it any other way.
I might... Try and get some sleep though. If you're feeling as crummy as I am you should think about it too.
...Do you want me to send a pizza over to your place tonight?
[That's always the trick. Finding out where the damage is and trying to lessen it. Varian's been doing that for a while now. ]
Yeah. Sleep is probably smart. Try to get as much as you can.
[Because the nightmares are SUPER fun.]
I'm okay. Fern's here, he's been getting food in for me. For once my kitchen is fully stocked. I think he said he was gonna get Kurt to cook something for me, too.
[As comforting as Doorstep Pizza might be right now. it probably wouldn't be wise. He's not quite ready to accept such generosity from her, after everything he's done to her.]
[Having just watched Neo die is just going to add to the nightmares she's already been having. It's a great time all around.]
Heh, I'm glad you've got them helping you out. Kurt seems like good people.
[There's a hint of frown but she hides it quick. As much as she was incredibly grateful there were people looking out for him she wished she could do a little bit more herself. It was silly but the doorstep pizza had just been a little way she could show she cared, even if for the longest time he hadn't known it was her.]
Good night. Or I guess good middle of the afternoon.
Kurt is good people. And... look, I know you two don't get along, but Fern's good people too. I mean... yeah, he's a lot more messy, but he was right here when I needed him.
[He wishes Fern would get the hell over his loathing towards Ruby. They have more in common than either of them realise. He catches the frown- he's terrible at people in general, but he likes to think he's got better with Ruby.]
Don't worry, I'm definitely calling in that pizza favour later. [When he's got his self-loathing back to a dull roar.] Good-some-point-in-the-day.
I don't doubt that. It's why I said I appreciate the both of them looking out for you. I wasn't trying to exclude him.
It's just awkward after everything. I don't know how to approach him or any of this. Not that I really did in the first place.
[And she really has been trying to approach it but nothing she does seems to work. That's a her and Fern problem and not something that needs to be dropped at Varian's feet unless things get dire. She can handle someone just not liking her.
Her smile brightens a touch at that. She's glad they could even talk about pizza after their talk in the confessional.]
I know, sorry. It's just been- [he heaves out a sigh, rubbing a hand over his face, he's so fucking tired] it;s just been a lot. And I know, I know you're trying, and I really appreciate that.
[Fern isn't easy when he puts those walls up, and he's not sure what can be done to make things better. Nothing ever seems to work. No amount of wishing on his part seems to do much on this.
I've been really glad for him. He dragged me back home when I first came back to life. I was uh... trying to wander the streets to help. Not the smartest thing I've ever done.
[Fern just lifted his scraggly ass back up before he could get himself killed again.]
I wish I could do more. I've... got a lot of messes to fix.
Hm. Well you're right. That does sound like something good people would do.
Yeah. That sounds more than a little dumb knowing how you must be feeling right now.
...But it says a lot about you too. We can talk about that some other time though, because I know you're not really looking to have it laid on thick right now.
[She knew even when they were fighting there was a good heart deep down in there. She was happy to see it springing back up.]
I know. I want to be out there too. Just be a little more patient. You'll get your chance.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[He lets out a soft hum, tilting his head as if in deep thought.]
I suppose that does mean you count as not-regular humanity. I guess I can make an exception for you.
[His smile fades- just a fraction. It doesn't go away completely, it's just a little softer. A little sadder. He's really struggling to see the good in him after the mess of July. ]
...Thank you. I- it might take me a little longer to see that again. [Not that he was all that good at seeing it before this.] I love you, too.
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[It would probably sound more ominous if she wasn’t doing a ridiculous voice.]
I’d appreciate it. Saves breaking and entering all the time.
[She sees his smile soften and she tries brighten hers up. It’s a little slower than normal. There’s been a lot of sadness this month she’s been trying to cope with.]
That’s fine. It’s okay to not be okay. A wise alchemist once said that. Just take it a step at a time. I’m here for you.
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[He is not.
He lets out a slow breath. She's right, hell, he'd said it himself and he knows he was right, too. It's what he needs, right now, the chance to just not be okay for a little while. He's tired and sad and so very scared that this town could do this again. Bring out the worst in him and have him hurt the people he cares about again. ]
Y-yeah. I think I just need that for a little while. It was a really, really awful month. Thank you, I'll- well, I'll do my best to be there for you, too.
[As much of a goddamn mess he is at the moment, anyway. ]
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It was... Easily the worst I've seen since I got here. Still kind of reeling from it to be honest.
[She let's out a breath. ...It was just hard to see everyone at each others throats like that. She couldn't help but just feel powerless to stop things here and back at home.]
So let's just not be okay together for awhile... Or next week or something. When we can can actually get out of bed.
I know you'll do just that. I appreciate it.
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[Trying to force it won't do any of them any good - as much as he'd like to bury it all and try to ignore it... he knows it won't just go away. He needs to take time to process this. ]
Okay, fair deal. I think I can do that.
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We'll call it walking when we're ready and go from there.
[She needs the time herself. She let a lot of pressure fall on her shoulders and while she doesn't think it broke her, there was something that cracked and she needs to figure out just... how that changes things.]
If that ends up being too much. Just let me know. We can always adjust what we're doing.
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[He has people here who love him, and that will help him a lot, he's sure. In trying to put his broken pieces back into something functional again. And it's certainly not lost on him how much Ruby's been put through the wringer. She's always got so much faith in people, but this time it was really turned against her. Himself included. ]
Thanks. Y- you too, okay? We'll figure this out together.
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[She'll figure it out. She just needs to time to figure out where's been bent and how to pull it back into place as best she can. It might not be perfect but that's not what she usually aims for.]
Of course. I wouldn't have it any other way.
I might... Try and get some sleep though. If you're feeling as crummy as I am you should think about it too.
...Do you want me to send a pizza over to your place tonight?
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Yeah. Sleep is probably smart. Try to get as much as you can.
[Because the nightmares are SUPER fun.]
I'm okay. Fern's here, he's been getting food in for me. For once my kitchen is fully stocked. I think he said he was gonna get Kurt to cook something for me, too.
[As comforting as Doorstep Pizza might be right now. it probably wouldn't be wise. He's not quite ready to accept such generosity from her, after everything he's done to her.]
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[Having just watched Neo die is just going to add to the nightmares she's already been having. It's a great time all around.]
Heh, I'm glad you've got them helping you out. Kurt seems like good people.
[There's a hint of frown but she hides it quick. As much as she was incredibly grateful there were people looking out for him she wished she could do a little bit more herself. It was silly but the doorstep pizza had just been a little way she could show she cared, even if for the longest time he hadn't known it was her.]
Good night. Or I guess good middle of the afternoon.
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[He wishes Fern would get the hell over his loathing towards Ruby. They have more in common than either of them realise. He catches the frown- he's terrible at people in general, but he likes to think he's got better with Ruby.]
Don't worry, I'm definitely calling in that pizza favour later. [When he's got his self-loathing back to a dull roar.] Good-some-point-in-the-day.
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It's just awkward after everything. I don't know how to approach him or any of this. Not that I really did in the first place.
[And she really has been trying to approach it but nothing she does seems to work. That's a her and Fern problem and not something that needs to be dropped at Varian's feet unless things get dire. She can handle someone just not liking her.
Her smile brightens a touch at that. She's glad they could even talk about pizza after their talk in the confessional.]
That's fair. I'll hold you too that.
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[Fern isn't easy when he puts those walls up, and he's not sure what can be done to make things better. Nothing ever seems to work. No amount of wishing on his part seems to do much on this.
He manages a tried smile for her all the same.]
You can, it's a legit promise.
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[Look. She knows the last month has been tough. She doesn't like it but she can only imagine they might be walking on eggshells for a bit.]
You were just making sure your friend got credit for what he was doing. There's nothing wrong with that.
We're all doing what we can. That's all you can do.
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[Fern just lifted his scraggly ass back up before he could get himself killed again.]
I wish I could do more. I've... got a lot of messes to fix.
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Yeah. That sounds more than a little dumb knowing how you must be feeling right now.
...But it says a lot about you too. We can talk about that some other time though, because I know you're not really looking to have it laid on thick right now.
[She knew even when they were fighting there was a good heart deep down in there. She was happy to see it springing back up.]
I know. I want to be out there too. Just be a little more patient. You'll get your chance.
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...But yeah, we can save that for another time. I'm not quite there yet.
[He's not ready to think about the good in him, not just yet, not after all the destruction he's caused.]
I know, I know. It's waiting it out. I'll get some rest, work it out from there.
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I'll get you when you're ready.
[She's just glad in the end she could shield him from the absolute worst of it. That's all she wanted.]
You'd better. Don't make me come over there and set Mr.Fluffers up at your door. I'll do it.
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[It's the blind leading the blind sometimes, but he's trying. That does get a tiny huff of a laugh out of him.]
Oh, believe me, I know you'd do it. Not a single doubt in my mind.